Honey, I'm Home [Roxas]

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♡TAGS: Axel

♡NOTES: I AM NOW BROKEN BEYOND RECOGNITION THANKS MADD

And there it was, the inevitable mention of how he was the "special" Nobody, how we was different from the rest because he came from Sora, the one who was connected to everything. Roxas was the closet there ever was to a Nobody being able to do the things that regular people did. He was the most like a human being, which roused so much interest towards him; the higher ups even made a replica in his honor, and it happened to become his other best friend; Organization XIII valued him more than any other member, which is why they tried so hard to keep him in the dark for all of those days - they couldn't risk him knowing the truth and revolting, although there was, in the end, no avoiding it.

It made sense - what Axel was saying to him. Why would he want to sacrifice what he was so sure he didn't have in the first place? Feeling all of these new sensations was something that, recently, the blond had come to cherish more than anything else. He wanted to be beside Axel and to allow the Flurry to make him feel this genuine happiness, and of course to return the favor. He smiled gently as he thought about it, snapping back into reality when he was told that too much food was made. Hah- with as hungry as Roxas was, it wouldn't be much of a problem at all. He was positive that all of the pasta would be given purpose.

Some of the soup was given to him and the thirteenth made quick work of it, even getting up and getting more, not allowing the scent of the smoke get t him anymore. He would have shower away all of of the ash that was clinging to his skin, and hopefully all of the sadness that had accumulated over the course that the eighth had been gone. Soon enough, his stomach was filled and he felt as though he was a brand new being; the boy took in a heavy breath and sighed pleasantly; he had almost forgotten what being full even felt like.

"I'm.. sorry. I shouldn't have been so selfish." He suddenly piped up again, being able to think much clearer as the color rushed back to his face and he wasn't looking so sullen and sunken-in. "It won't happen again. Promise." He was able to smile again, wholeheartedly so. His azure depths met those emeralds that he had missed oh-so much. It felt.. Quite nice to be back.

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Axel was quiet as he tucked into his soup, enjoying any flavor that wasn't rum. He really needed a better coping method when he was feeling down. He wouldn't be surprised if he woke up in the morning with his head pounding. It would be the least of what he deserved after how he had acted. He shouldn't have left Roxas the way he did and going to Port Royal and mess with pirates was the second stupid thing he had done that night.

He vaguely watched the blond as he ate. No, that was wrong. The Key inhaled his soup and got up for seconds. Every once in a while, he forgot how much food the smaller Nobody could really put away. Granted, not eating for a week would certainly help one's appetite. Should I make dessert, too? He asked quietly, brow raised at the empty bowl. His own was barely half finished. He was pacing himself so not to make himself sick and let the carbs soak up what it could of those drinks still in his stomach. Perhaps he would just talk his other half through making dessert. There was a slight ache staring behind his eyes and that didn't bode well.

His bright emeralds met the oceans of Roxas' eyes as he chewed through another bite. It was good to see the life back in those perfect blue hues. It was good to see that the thirteenth looked farther away from the brink of death. Selfishness aside, he appreciated that he was cared for enough that Roxas didn't want to function without him. However, how was he supposed to help anyone if he let himself waste away. You can be certain kinds of selfish, Roxy. Certain kinds you can act on. You selfishly want to keep certain people in your life, you fight for them, He said softly, hoping that his words would have some meaning and give his blond purpose.

Then there's the selfish that hurts you. That's the not okay part. Don't let it consume you. Hmm, perhaps he should have been a bit more aware of that himself once Roxas had returned to Sora. He had been obsessed with getting Roxas back, selfishly, and he ended up sacrificing himself for that cause. At the point, he had given up on seeing his blond again, but he had still gone through such lengths to try and bring the thirteenth back out of the brunet. Well, they were here now and maybe they could both learn from that bit of hindsight. No one every said that wisdom was easy to come by.

Roxas

♥ thanks tia!

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♡TAGS: Axel

♡NOTES: finally the kids are calming down it's about damn time ugh

Axel, out of all of the members in the Organization, was the only one that Roxas had come to know that had quite a parental side, if that was the correct word used to describe it. He would do anything in his power to look after those he cared about, and would seemingly go to the ends of the universe to keep them safe. When he started speaking about the different kinds of selfishness, the blond listened wholeheartedly, noting a few things that resembled the way the Flurry acted as well. Roxas stared at the bottom of his empty bowl, taking in a few deep breaths to try and regain his sense of self - whatever that was supposed to mean, anyway.

"Yeah, says the guy that blew up the gray room." Roxas said slyly, a smile coming onto his features; it had been so long since he had been able to joke about something like that.. Well, technically it had only been around a week or so, but to him it had felt like more than centuries had gone by since he had been by the side of the one he loved more than anything in this life.

"I get what you're saying, though." The boy got to his feet, making sure he had a handle on his balance before grabbing his dishes and carrying them to the sink. He would handle those tomorrow; as of now, he wasn't ready to deal with any form of chores. "And I don't think I can eat another bite. I might pop." He laughed gently to accompany his words, moving back over to the table to grab his chair and scoot it around so he could sit next to the Flurry. Plopping down in his seat, Roxas leaned to the side, resting his head against the other male's arm. He was able to close his eyes and smile, his hand instinctively searching to find the eighth's. The Key of Destiny intertwined their fingers together, and he squeezed it tightly.

He wasn't going to let go so easily again, that was for sure.

"We're.. Pretty helpless, aren't we?" The boy said in a bit of a solemn tone, though his smile remained. "Nobodies trying to do anything we can to be normal people. We can't even be apart from each other or else we break down."

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The Flurry was about to take another bite as Roxas made his little joke. Okay, yeah, Axel's selfishness could be all consuming and the fire he created definitely was if he wasn't careful. However, it would have hurt Roxas a lot more than him. He pointed his spoon at the boy and waved it a little. I would have been fine, thank you. The fire was for everything else and I was ... feeling ... umm ... Damn, he didn't have a good option that wasn't selfish. He had wanted the castle to burn because it was painful to be here sometimes. It bothered him to think on everything that had occurred and how awful he had been. It was only when he was with the thirteenth that he knew any peace in this place, not that anyone else would ever know that.

He cleared his throat and shifted, eyes falling to the dredges left in his bowl. He sulked, playing up the pout that pulled at his lower lip to help lighten the mood as it so needed. The jokes were necessary to forget the complete ass he had been as he wallowed in his self-pity. He couldn't have that. I'd rather you a little rounder than the skeleton I came home to, He commented quietly, wondering if he should still push for more food to fill his little Nobody up. He wouldn't though, grateful that the blond pulled his chair around just to be close to him.

Something deep in his chest eased at the close contact, the fingers laced with his calming the buzzing in his head. The ache behind his eyes lessened, giving him something better to focus on. He sighed, surprised that he was still wanted like this. Normal people fall apart without each other, too, so I think we're close, He replied, setting his spoon down and reaching up with his now free hand to play with Roxas' golden hair. I know that I haven't been the same since I met you. You changed everything. It was a truth that Axel couldn't deny, knowing that this relationship had completely reshaped everything the redhead had been working for.

It had certainly changed his priorities and was the final straw in destroying something that he had foraged a very long time before he ever met the blond. Roxas was his saving grace and his biggest weakness. Seriously, though, I can't exist without you. I won't have a reason to fight. Now, if only he could figure out how to keep the Key safe through this fight that would be the best thing. His reason for living couldn't be near him when he went dark with his amber eyes. A thought occurred to him then. Hey, do me a favor. I think I can deal with yellow eyes, but the hair. Kill me if my hair goes white.

Roxas

♥ thanks tia!

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♡TAGS: Axel

♡NOTES: finally the kids are calming down it's about damn time ugh

This was definitely what he had missed the most out of his lover being gone. He missed this closeness, and he could feel his body relaxing due to the contact, and he could sense that Axel was doing the same for reasons alike. A gentle hand was stroking his blond hair, almost making it easy to fall asleep in this sitting position. The keyblade wielder took in a deep breath, thinking about the concept of "normal" and how they had been told in the beginning that feelings like these would never exist for them. Understandably so, as well; Xemnas wanted to keep them all in the dark, to allow them to think that these things they experienced were in fact just "memories" of who they once were.

Roxas didn't care what he was told, he was more than aware that Sora had never been through something like this. All of this was new, and in a way, that was what made it all the more exciting, as well as fearsome.

The jokes started up again soon after their little intimate moment, and Roxas couldn't stifle the laughter than arise from his stomach. The redhead's sense of humor was always something that was able to crack up the thirteenth's composure. It was times like this that made this life worth it, and even though the timeline was messed up beyond recognition, the blond.. Couldn't help but think about how much he didn't want it to be changed - how he didn't want it to be fixed.

Was that.. Wrong? Oh well, he didn't care.

Selfishness was okay.

"I'll take pictures then find a way to bring you back. Then I'll have them for blackmail material." Roxas stated rather matter-of-factly with a big grin upon his features, one that was rather daring. The more time that he spent around the Flurry of Dancing Flames, the more qualities that were housed within the eighth were leaking over into the innocent's little frame. Roxas was becoming more sarcastic and much more playful, which was the opposite of a problem, in the end. He was learning new things and was really starting to become his very own individual - what a miraculous feat.

"I was gonna go take a shower, and I - uh - really.. Don't wanna be by myself." He said gently, choosing his words rather carefully, though he didn't exactly have to. As much as the little guy had learned, there was always more for him to take in, more for him to get accustomed to. "Do you.. Think you could come with me?"

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Axel felt the tension dropping to a degree that was just about normal for them. They had never really fought, not truly in his mind. Even when he had gone to try and bring him back, those weren't real fights. That was Roxas not understanding and Axel hadn't the ability to make him understand well enough. This had been the worst of it, and he could feel a low level of discontent settling in. It had nothing to do with the blond beside him because this was the one good thing he had.

He really did worry about the eyes and the hair, yet he was going to hide his fear behind jokes and pretend everything was going to be okay. A look of feigned shock came over his features, eyes going wide. You little devil. Here I thought I was the one going dark, He breathed. He couldn't hold it long though. He broke into a grin and chuckled with a shake of his head. His little angel was truly falling and he wouldn't have him any other way. He pressed a kiss to the blond's forehead with a contented sigh. This was what he needed. If only they could curl up here and never have to leave he would be able to beat this. Roxas wasn't stressful most of the time and he needed this comfort.

The Key was in just as much need. A glimmer of sadness shot through his eyes as he realized what he had done with Roxas statement that he didn't want to be alone. The Flurry had passed on his abandonment issues. They both feared being alone now, having the other gone from their lives. The thirteenth had left him twice and he had obsessed with getting him back. It had felt awful being left behind, feeling so unwanted and disregarded. Now, in an effort to keep Roxas safe, the firebug had walked away from his beloved. Had Roxas understood that it was out of love? Did he know that he was still wanted no matter what? It didn't matter now. The doubt was there.

Axel smiled gently, pushing to his feet and depositing his bowl into the sink to be handled later. Of course I will. At least this time there isn't a massive amount of sugar, He replied. The taller Nobody held out his hand to his smaller counterpart, ready to clean up himself. It would be good to get the soot and Port Royal off.

Roxas

♥ thanks tia!

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♡TAGS: Axel

♡NOTES: finally the kids are calming down it's about damn time ugh

Life was coursing through his veins again, and it was rather easy to feel. The color was returning to him not only because of the nourishment he had finally taken in, but because he could sense that happiness coming back to him. His dependency was so advanced that his entire demeanor was coming back to him, and when Axel was away, he would take that aspect with him like some sort of luggage that couldn't be left behind.

His request was met to without any hesitation whatsoever, as well as a snide remark to accompany it. this was Axel we were talking about, it wasn't like he wasn't going to tack on something like that, reminiscing to something that reminded the blond of a fun time the two of them had shared. Roxas got to his feet, waiting for the redhead to follow suit before he set off for the showers. It was such a large room, one that the young Nobody never really did get used to. There were sections laid out for each shower, giving the user as much space necessary, and there was plenty of room for the two of them to fit into one.

Roxas undressed himself, almost falling when taking his boxers off, laughing at himself for not having the balance to control his body. Shaking his head at himself, the boy threw his clothes to the side, reminding himself that he'd throw them in the dirty laundry after they were finished - if he would even remember. He was so euphoric with the fact that Axel was back- everything else was just secondary information, honestly. He started the water, waiting a few moments before stepping in.

The steam made the air thick and cleansing, all of the depression and loneliness washing off of his skin and flowing down the drain. Peeking his head out, he made sure that the Flurry was to follow him, and he smiled whenever he made eye contact with those glorious emeralds. He would never, ever get tired of just looking at his boyfriend.

Damn.

Whenever Axel entered the shower, cold air got in and caused a chill to run down the thirteenth's spine. Taking a step forward, Roxas placed his forehead against the other's loser chest, closing his eyes and smiling, allowing the water to run through his blond hair and darken the color, as well as weigh it down a bit, which caused it to lose some of its spikiness. His arms began to move on their own, wrapping around Axel's waist; he didn't want to move from this spot - ever. He felt at ease, he felt relaxed, and he felt at home. His chest fluttered, as well as his stomach; ugh, that burning sensation behind his eyes was coming back. Why was he always the embodiment of a human waterworks?

At least it wouldn't be noticeable in the water, right?

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The Flurry let all thought fall away. He didn't want to worry about his own issues. He didn't want to think about the issues he had caused for Roxas, both physical and mental. Having just caused enough trauma for him to develop abandonment issues wasn't something he really wanted to dwell on. He didn't think it healthy to let this co-dependency to weigh on him too much right now either. It needed to be addressed, sure, but right this moment they needed to relax.

For the moment, their demons had to sleep and allow for them to function in a vaguely normal way. They wouldn't be able to do battle with these things unless they were well rested and well fed in Roxas' case. He followed the shorter male to the showers, glad that he wasn't a sticky mess with whipped topping in his hair. He fell a step or two behind, marveling at how resilient the Key was. He had been a zombie at best not long ago, offering up his very existence, now he was chipper and eager to get clean and back to a more normal level of living. The redhead was starting to feel old knowing how much had happened in such a short amount of time and knew he still had to keep going for a little longer.

He slowly undressed himself as he watched the blond disrobe, tripping over his own clothes with a laugh. He grinned, keeping it pleasant even as he surreptitiously checked for any bad burns he hadn't seen before. Luckily, there was nothing serious to mar that smooth skin and he hesitated less as his own black garments added to the pile. The firebug slowly headed to the running shower as Roxas peeked his head out, obviously checking that he wasn't alone. A pang of guilt ran through him even as he opened the curtain to enter.

The feeling was quick to dissipate once his blond turned to face him, hair slicked down with the warm water. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms immediately around the smaller frame that pressed against him. For the first time in a week a genuine smile of happiness quirked his lips. There was no joking, nothing else to provoke the reaction other than the fact that the one he loved embraced him and wasn't condemning him for his past actions. He didn't deserve someone this good, this pure, but he was glad to have it. This love was the only thing that would keep him fighting for the light and his only reason for existing right now.

Thank you.

Roxas

♥ thanks tia!

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♡TAGS: Axel

♡NOTES: finally the kids are calming down it's about damn time ugh

Such a surreal thing, but it was something that the blond was used to. He was absolutely spoiled off of this, and the fact that he had gone off the deep end when the wasn't around his redhead for the short span of a week showed just how much selfishness played a role in his behavior. Maybe that wasn't the best way to look at the chain of events that had taken place, but.. It all had to stem from somewhere, right?

Time was just like the memory chain that Namine had tampered with - things always happened due to a snowball effect, and sequences didn't just happen. Things were pushed by a force and were affected by attributes that were infused in someone else's personality; Roxas was selfish. Roxas couldn't figure out how to be apart from Axel. Roxas gave up.

Because Roxas was selfish.

Arms were wrapped tightly around him, and the amount of comfort they brought was completely extraordinary. The Key of Destiny had to admit that he had all but completely forgotten what this had felt like, even though it had only been a few days since the two of the had been together like this. A smile accompanied the burning sensation pushing its way past his eyes, the salty tears blending in with the shower water seamlessly.

Thank you.

Those words were.. Unexpected. Roxas pulled back slightly just to look up and stare curiously into the enchanting emeralds that housed so much emotion, way too much for Axel to be considered a husk. His hands turned to fists against the skin of the eighth's back, nails gently trailing against the smooth slickness. He hadn't a clue what he was being thanked for, but he was able to piecemeal that maybe.. It was the same reason that Roxas felt inclined to thank the Flurry. They were both completely reliant upon one another, and now that they had accepted that, they could work around it, as well as together. It didn't have to happen again.

"..Yeah." He said with a gentle voice, his sapphires becoming utterly lost in the opposing gems. "You too."

[End]

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